You’re pregnant! Two words all couples who are trying to conceive dream about hearing. But for the Savage family, their good news had a caveat. It was not their child. Carolyn Savage had been implanted with another couple’s embryos.
Rather than terminate the pregnancy, the Savages have decided to act as a surrogate. The other couple, Shannon and Paul Morell, who are parents of 2-and-a-half-year-old twin girls, were considering having a third child using their frozen embryos. Then the clinic called.
“It’s just the oddest feeling to have somebody else carrying your child because, as a parent, you want to do everything possible to protect your child,” Shannon Morell said during an interview Wednesday on the Today show. ”We were totally powerless and out of control. Even though we were grateful, it was just a terrible feeling.”
Of course, this shocking story struck a chord and raised lots of questions among those in our community who are trying to conceive. Could you be as courageous as the Savages and give up the child? Some said no.
“This is going to be a very unpopular opinion, but depending on how early in my pregnancy I found out, I would actually terminate and have IVF repeated. I know I couldn’t handle giving up a child I’d carried to term and I also know that it wouldn’t be right to keep these people’s bio-child if it were going to cause the other couple strife.” — smiling2007
“Why do they have to give it back? It is not their error; it’s the clinic’s… I applaud their honesty and courage but if this happened to me, I’m not sure I would just hand the baby over.” — dolcib
The Savages, who have three children, were trying for a fourth. This swayed some opinions:
“I can’t even put myself into their shoes. The only thing that can even slightly make the situation better (and I mean only a fraction of a percentage) is at least they already have three children. If this happened to one of us [TTC - Your First Child] than it would be worse [in my opinion]. When I initially heard the situation I thought how horrible for them to have to give up this child, but then I had to put myself in the shoes of the real parents. They could be any one of us just praying for their first child, and somewhere along the line fate stepped in and brought them their child via surrogate.” — cheshireliz
“It was bad that this mistake happened. But I find myself not feeling as bad for the pregnant woman as I thought I’d be. After all, she has all the kids she wants; she just feels that she can’t just discard the remaining embryos.” — witzz
And many simply applauded the couple for their decision:
“I found the couple so inspiring. They are taking a nightmare of a situation and dealing with such grace and compassion. I so hope she can get pregnant with a gestational carrier. It will never change what happened, but man, they deserve it!” — adav75
“I can’t begin to imagine how upsetting that must have been to discover. I admire them for deciding to act as a surrogate for the other couple.” — sweetsoil
What would you do? Terminate the pregnancy? Fight for joint custody? Hand over the baby?
